Dream Girl

(A word before I begin: This post was actually written before the previous post, but because I felt an explanation was needed for the delay, this one is coming after ‘Summers of our Discontent’.)

Hello.

I have talked before about the value of dreams; about how I feel they sometimes are your subconscious trying to help you with what might have been missed.

This is a little… different.

I honestly don’t know how to classify this. It is a small portion of a larger dream. The rest, while a complete (albeit bizarre) tale, seemed more like my anger being released as safely as possible over what has been happening to me professionally. So amidst the tale of me being a transportation department investigator on the pursuit of serial killers who turned all their victims to meat pies (and I haven’t watched Sweeney Todd for some time), trying to stop an terrorist attacks perpetrated by talking sapient animals, and finding the secret as to why all locales the transportation dept. went to looked like Disney attractions was the following segment that seemed INCREDIBLY out of place with the rest of it…

This sequence featured me in a role similar to real life. I was working as a ticket agent for the Transportation Agency. Evidently in my dream, all major forms of transportation had been combined into one: the Transportation Agency. I was working at the main counter all by myself (no surprise there) on a slow, quiet day (BIG surprise there). I was filling out paperwork during the lull when she walked up.

She was about my age, possibly a little younger and around five and a half feet, just a bit shorter than me. Slim, but not skinny, and naturally curvy. She had pale skin that looked well maintained. But the detail that really stuck out was her hair: long and straight with the color and sheen of obsidian. I acted professional, trying not to stare at her hair, and subtly avoided looking at her eyes. (Something I tend to do in real life, never quite sure why I do it…)

She was all excited, lugging a big black suitcase behind her. I was processing her ticket and mentioned her destination: Australia. With a passion, she began telling me how she had just sold everything she owned except for the contents of her suitcase and was moving there to start a whole new life, free from the burdens of her current one. I listened as I processed her paperwork, entranced with her ideas of fresh starts and new adventures, hearing not only the enthusiasm, but the intelligence in her voice as well.

I finally finished her forms and handed her back her paperwork. As I was wishing her well on her new experiences, we both finally looked face to face, and into each other’s eyes.

And time stopped.

I really don’t know how to describe what I felt. It was like we were peering into each other’s souls, connecting down to the deepest levels. As we gazed upon each other’s naked psyche, we both realized that we were what each other had been looking for for our entire lives, the part we were missing to truly be whole… but that we had found each other too late. If we had met a month, or as little as a week earlier, the connection would have been able to have happened and things would be drastically different. But the events that were in place were already in motion, and too far gone to change, and our potential together would go unrealized.

The long timeless instant broke, she grabbed her paperwork, and left for her transport, the enthusiasm and passion seen earlier dimmed a bit by our realization. Both of us not speaking, but still connected enough to be feeling remorseful and wishing it had been different outcome other than this. As she disappeared, life around me instantly sprung back and resumed into the chaos it had been, and the dream swept me away to another surreal locale and situation as it had done before this intermission.

I woke up soon afterwards, not sad or depressed, but confused and feeling a small hint of longing. I got up, got a drink of water, and went back to sleep. There were no more dreams that night.

Normally I can find meaning in my dreams, but this one has me a bit baffled. This lady is someone I have never seen in my life. She looked like no celebrity, friend, coworker, or random person I had known or even so much as glimpsed. Was she my idealized woman? A representation of some goal I am missing? I really don’t know. I thought writing it down would help… but I still have am no closer. So I am posting this, and hope that maybe some random person might give me insight to what this can possibly mean…